Writing about more than being a mom


It's hard for me to sit down and find something to write about that doesn't involve my life as a mom. I look back at journals and past blogs that I used to write in, and see them filled with an overflow of creative ramblings, all ranging from the craziest things imaginable to the next. It was easier to write, I think, back then, because that was all I knew. I didn't have the responsibility of caring for another human being, nor did I give two cents about anyone besides myself. Even though being a mom is hands down the best thing that has ever happened to me, when I want to sit down and start seriously writing, I feel like my mind lately has just been closed to writing about parenthood. Granted, I've got some great material on my Trulybear, but lately, I've been stuck.

Manic Monday Quotes

Ben: “They seem to love bubbles.”
Pete: “Oh, god, they go ape shit over bubbles.”
Ben: “They’re really going ape shit.”
Pete: “I mean, that’s an incredible thing about a child. I mean, what’s so great about bubbles?”
Ben: “They float. You can pop them. I mean, I get it. I get it.”
Pete: “I wish I liked anything as much as my kids like bubbles.”
Ben: "That's Sad."
Pete: "Totally sad. Their smiling faces just point out your inability to love anything"

- From Knocked Up

Bubbles make me a little crazy. Truly's dad bought her bubbles the other day, and they have been invading my house .. and my mind it seems. Sure they're fun, for a little while. They come in all different size, and they are pretty cool when they reach that huge size and become as big your head. I can definitely see the joy that they bring to kids. But for me, they make me crazy.

Maybe its how your hands get all sticky from holding the little container, dipping in and out with the little wand. Maybe it's how you get light headed from the blowing, and your lips start to hurt from the constant puckering. It could also, and probably the main reason why they make me crazy, is the fact that my dear daughter only likes to blow bubbles inside the house, to the suffering extent to making our wood floors sticky and our carpets soaked ... and sticky. Yes there are many reasons why I hate bubbles, and many reasons why she loves them.

But the quote above is so true. Our children are so passionate about certain things. They can become so excited, so ecstatic about one thing, it makes us wonder, where did all of our passion go? My daughter gets so happy, light up, squeals, and goes bananas for bubbles. I try to look for one thing that I can get so excited for, that's even close to how she feels about blowing bubbles. Let me tell you, I'm still thinking...

Are you that excited about your work? That passionate about your dreams? Do you have a smiling outlook on life?

First Vlog




I know it's Sunday and I was looking forward to starting Ask Stepfanie Sundays this week, but it will have to wait until next week. Why? Honestly, didn't feel like it :-) Tsk Tsk on me. I'm all about honesty.

I decided to post my very first Vlog. It was a little dark in the room, and about halfway through Truly interrupts me, but I use this Vlog to answer some FAQ's I get from followers and readers.

Enjoy! And don't forget to get your free e-book from yesterdays post!

Free E-Book Giveaway

So there are a lot of really cool things going on here on my blog, and I want to fill you in on everything I have planned.

You can look forward to:
  • Ask Stepfanie Sundays: Have a dilemma going on? Need Advice about something? Or maybe just a second opinion? Submit your questions and situations to me and not only will you get my advice, but the advice from the whole blogosphere. Anonymous of course.
  • Big Giveaways: Packages, Tickets, Vacations, Do I really need to explain this?
  • Weekly Interviews: Interviews with other bloggers, business owners, and interesting people coming your way!
  • Upcoming E-Book (s): I've been doing a lot of writing lately, and blog followers and subscribers will be the first to know and the first to have access to all of them. Whether your a blogger, young mother, writer, entrepreneur, student, there will be something for you!
And the one to look forward to right NOW, a free e-book just for you!:
Short & Sweet Guide to Free Marketing for Mommy Bloggers


This book isn't just for bloggers who are moms, it's pretty much just for any blogger, and it really isn't a "book", more like a pamphlet. Ok Ok, a little misleading, but the title still sounds cool! Anywho, it's just filled with some short tips about how to market your blog and how to gain more followers and subscribers, in a short, sweet, and free way. Hence the title. :-)

This is just a little excerpt from the upcoming book Complete Guide to Mommy Blogging, so enjoy this one!

Also notice, I am now offering sponsorship on my blog to the right. If your interesting about advertising, feel free to contact me on my Contact Me page.

So how to get the book? Easy as delicious pie! You must do these 2 things:

  • Leave a comment including your e-mail address (if you don't want your e-mail public, feel free to send me a message on my Contact page instead) and you'll get it e-mailed to you pronto!
  • Also, be sure to Follow or Subscribe to this blog. If your already following or subscribed, obviously you are cordially exempt (and appreciated) from this part. :-)
That's all! This book is yours if you do both, not just one, both! I mean it's FREE!

*If you would like to contribute the upcoming book and feel like you are very knowledgeable about Mommy Blogging or would like to add your links to the credits, feel free to Contact Me*

Stay tuned.... Awesome things are coming!

Our Guilty Pleasure

My 2 year old and I have this understanding. We love the movies. I've always loved going to the movies. Everything about the theaters drives me crazy. Sounds orgasmic? It is. The popcorn, the nachos, the seats, the darkness, the loudness, and just the fact that your watching this awesome movie on this huge screen. I mean c'mon, that's pretty cool if you ask me.

So when my daughter was born, I knew my movie going days were over for some time. I was not going to be that mother who brought the stroller into the movie theater. Not only was I afraid for my daughter's hearing, but who would want to pay for a movie ticket, then have to leave 15 minutes into it because there baby, who they thought was a good idea to bring in the movie, is crying?! Not me. Sure I would go to the movies every once in a while, but I waited patiently until I was able to take my daughter, hand in hand, to go share this awesome experience I called movie going.

So she made it. 2 years old, I forgot exactly what she watched, but we watched it. The whole movie. She bought her little kids pack of popcorn, candy, and a drink (I know I know, not so healthy, but I cut her a break when we go), and was ready to be entertained.

About a dozen movies later, including Twilight AND New Moon :-) (yes she loves loves loves Edward and sat through both of them), my daughter and I are obsessed with catching the latest flicks at the theater. She pays for the tickets, gets our snacks, and chooses the seats. She knows that that is her and mommy time and we laugh and cry, and get fat on salty food together.

Bonding at its best.

Do you have something special that you and your kids do together? Something reserved just for them?


5 Things I Can't Live Without




Sure I could live without them, but why would I try??

1. My iPhone. My schedule, appointments, homework assignments, blog readers, games, movies, music, checkbook, my LIFE is on my iPhone. Good thing it's passcode protected.


2. Journal. I have this leather journal that I write in daily, sometimes more. Here is where I write everything and anything about my life, my feelings, and just things I'd probably want no one to read about, but I can't help it, I need to see my thoughts to process my decisions.

3. Orange Juice. I'm pregnant. Don't pregnant women crave things? Mine is Orange juice. I need it. All the time.

4. My Truly Ring. I have this ring that Truly (ok my mom) gave me on my very first mothers days. It's a gold ring with two hearts, one has a diamond, Truly's birthstone, and the other has a Ruby, my birthstone. It means the world to me, and reminds me of my choices I need to make everyday for her.

5. Gray Toms Shoes. These things are awesom
e. I love that they are grey so no one can tell if they are really dirty or not, they are super comfortable, and I feel super cool and hip wearing them.

What are your items you would be lost without?

6 Months Down, 3 To Go

This morning I had another monthly check up for baby Sophia, Waverly, Zara. Ok, so I"m still deciding on names, and this decision isn't going well. I mean my daughter's name is Truly, I can't just give my second daughter a regular name like Sarah, or Heather (those are great names though!) but whenever someone hears the name "Truly", they say things like "How unique!, How Beautiful, or That's Lovely", and then I'll introduce my other daughter, Sarah, and people will just say ... "nice." It's not that I don't like those names, I do, it's just I've already set up Truly with this awesomely, unique name, I have to do the same with the next one, or else I'll be getting in trouble with my new daughter for the rest of my life.....

But besides name problems, everything else is peachy keen. Due date is still May 28, and baby's heartbeat is sounding well. Besides the kicking and constant somersaulting, I think this will be ok...

Keep your fingers crossed, and baby girl names coming!

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Mommy, this is MY playgroup


It isn't some big secret that these "play groups" that us parents, especially moms, want to attend aren't really for our children. Their for us. We disguise our meet ups with juice, sandwiches, and toys galore, but really we plop the kids down, hope they don't break something, and relinquish in the fact that we are surrounded by other mothers who are going through the exact same thing. I know, that was a pretty long sentence, but I think it works.

I was once in a play group. We met every week or so, sometime during the week and then the weekend as well. My motivation was "I need to get out of the house, meet some other moms so I don't feel so alone, and if Truly makes a friend or two, that's awesome." I am the mom sitting there, drink in hand, desperate for some adult interaction. The appropriate kind of course.

We would talk about our jobs, staying at home, husbands, boyfriends, life; it was so good to hear that my struggles were the same as these women. We all worried about things like autism, and praised silly things like the first poop in the toilet. I discovered I wasn't the only one who would ramble on and on to my toddler, it's normal! Completely normal!

As time went on, we discovered that although we were each desperate for the opportunity to connect with other moms, we each had a lack of one thing in particular. Time. Some moms had 2 or 3 kids, with schedules so out of sync, unpredicatbleness and not-enough-time-ness (yes I connected them) were extremely common in my play group. There were times were I wanted to go and Truly would ask if she would see her friends, but a glance at the clock told me we would not make it that day. The stack of papers on my desk told me we weren't going to make it that week, and my filled in calendar told me the rest of the month was off limits.

While I think play groups are great for children who aren't in school yet, they are sort of an essential for us mothers who kids are pre-schoolers and younger. So now I'm thinking of either starting another one, or joining a local play group. What do ya'll think about play groups? Are they helpful, are you in one, have you been in one?

5 Ways to Slow Down

Saturday Jan 30 2010

I find myself very busy, constantly. There is always something that needs to be done, right now. Even though I may find a 15 minute space of time just for me, I feel like I'm not doing enough and like a rabbit, sprint off to my next assignment. My plate right now looks something like this:

  • scouring the internet for writing jobs
  • e-mailing editors, leaving phone calls
  • registering for Spring classes, ordering textbooks
  • writing e-books, books, and books
  • outlines e-books, books, and books
  • cleaning while Dora echos through the house
  • making breakfast, lunch, snack
  • hiding chocolate
  • scrambling around the house on all fours, while the 30 lbs on my back screams "Giddy Up Mommy!"
  • updating blogs
  • finding missing Snow White, or Ariel, or whoever decided to be lost that day
  • fit in some hours to work my @home job
Look familiar? Right now I have only one child, your list is probably this x3.

This is my overflowing plate. So you see those 15 minutes of relaxation just don't fit into my schedule. But after reading a blog post by Leo Babauta over at Zen Habits, about How Not To Hurry, I decided to list the 5 ways to slow down that would apply to me, maybe you:

1. Prioritize

I think if you would put Prioritize in your find box and searched my blog, you'd find it a lot. It's something I always talk about, but something I rarely do. A slap on the wrist for me. List what needs to be done today, not what you'd like to get done, but just the things that need to be done. Don't overflow your plate with things that will just eat your time.

2. Keep it Short

If your to-do list is hanging out of your car window as you are racing to the grocery store, it may be a little too long. (I've seen this). Limit yourself to 2 to 3 things a day. One thing I really like from the Zen Habits, is that when you spend your time focusing on just a couple of things, the quality gets so much better because your time is spent focusing rather than jumping from topic to topic.

3. Reserve your peak hours, for you

If you write better at the crack of dawn, get up at 6AM and write. Don't spend the rest of the day trying to fill in blank blog posts, when you know your best material is written before the kids get up. If your ideas are fresh right after dinner, make sure everyone knows, that 1 hour space, you are to be left alone.

4. Cut back on commitments

Do you really have to be the 3rd parent volunteer for Stacy's soccer team, and have to go to every meeting Monday, Wednesday, and Friday? Or can you just be the loud, hollering mom at the Saturday games. At Zen Habits, Leo had a good point when he wrote that we are over committed and that is why we are so rushed. When we try to add so many things in our lives, social groups, 100 sports, volunteer, classes, groups, hobbies, we are actually de- valuing our lives. Pick 4 or 5 essential commitments that won't over burn you.

5. Be Ok with not doing anything

To me, this one is the most ridiculous, insane thing, anyone could ever do. How can you not be ok with not doing anything. Then I did it. I sat there on my couch, tea in hand, and listened to the birds outside, concentrated on my breathing, closed my eyes. If we aren't doing anything, we get impatient and nervous, but after spending just those 15 minutes, inside my mind, I was able to refresh and get things done with more satisfaction, not to mention appreciate my comfy couch.

Bottom line is, we are rushed, especially us parents. We try to do everything and forget about our well being in the process. There was also a quote that started off the blog post at Zen habits, it was this:

"Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished..." - Lao Tzu

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